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Fruit of the Spirit: Kindness

Kindness.  I think we all hope that others use this word to describe us.  There are some people in our lives who are very easy to love and be kind towards.  Why?  Because they are kind themselves.  They treat us as we wish to be treated and it’s a two-way, give-and-take street.

But what about those who aren’t kind?  The people we interact with on a daily basis who do not reciprocate with kindness but instead are mean, hurtful, nasty, and harsh.  How does our kindness measure up with this group?  I know for me, not well.  I like to pretend these people don’t exist and choose to focus on how kind I’m able to be with everyone else.  Can you relate?

But God doesn’t call us to just be kind to the easy ones does He?  As much as we might wish that were the case.  Ephesians 4:23 is pretty clear when it commands us to “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

Part of our problem with extending kindness to the unkind is that we forget how kind God has been with us.  By nature, our hearts are so ugly, mean, and harsh but nevertheless God extended kindness to us by sending His Son to die on the Cross and pay the penalty for our undeserving, sinful hearts.  If we can remember that we were on the receiving end before we ever had the ability to be on the giving end, I think our understanding of kindness would drastically change.

A few years ago I watched as a friend of mine navigated the rough waters of a difficult relationship.  She had to interact with a very unkind person on a daily basis and it really wore on her over time.  However, God taught me a lot about what it looks like to fight for kindness through her difficult relationship.  She spent time daily praying for this person.  Praying that God would soften and change their heart.  Is there anything more loving than lifting someone up in prayer?  Especially someone who doesn’t treat you well?  Not only did she pray for their heart, but she also prayed that the Holy Spirit would give her eyes to see this person and love this person as He did.  Both very difficult things to pray!

The way she handled that difficult relationship reminded me of Matthew 5:44 and Luke 6:27-28 that say,  “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” and “Do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.”  I don’t like those verses very much even though I know I am called to live them out.

Sometimes I think we view kindness like a layer of clothing that we can put on or take off depending on the situation and the person.  Instead, I think it’s an attitude of the heart that the Holy Spirit enables and cultivates.  Just like your friends and family rub off on you as you spend more time with them, the same is true of our relationship with God.  As we spend time in the Bible reading and studying examples of Christ’s kindness towards others and time praying that the Holy Spirit would give us kindness and patience towards our “enemies” and our “abusers,” I think we’ll begin to see our attitude change.

So, start by remembering your great need for His kindness towards you. Look for it defined and displayed throughout the Word.  Ask the Holy Spirit to produce an attitude of kindness in you, and pray for the same in the hearts of those around you.

 

In Him,

Stacey

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